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Equity: Pym and F'kir

As a firestorm of controversy brews throughout the nation, Company officials urge investors to remain calm. Should you feel agitated, consider these simple scenarios:

Is having the accelerator stuck in the down position really a problem? Aim for happy hour.

Need to escape a boring Tea Party? Try the $2 Red Stripes.

Recently elected to the senate? Chill and listen for a minute.

Pym (pineapple, feta, jalapeno, pepperoncini)
F’kir (veggie combo)

Published:: 02.10.10 / 5pm

Location:: Il Pirata

File Under:: Equity, Events

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False Profit, LLC: Bigger than Money

False Profit is passionate about pushing the limits of what a Limited Liability Company can be. Our award-winning products and services enable innovative forms of expression and empower human beings to create and experience the most engaging moments in life. And shouldn’t all companies exist to serve human needs? We proudly transcend mere financial success by paying dividends to investors through more powerful currencies: cultural advancements and life-quality enhancements. False Profit has been providing Zero Percent Financial Return, Guaranteed, since 2001.

Invest wisely in the Company today — your time, energy, money, inspiration, and love — and prepare to reap true profit far in excess of what you would yield with comparable investments in our competitors. The life you enjoy may be your own.

Read The False Profit Manifesto for more details.

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